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Mr. Massagy Text Walkthrough


Walt the Dog
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Mr. Massagy Text Walkthrough

 

Introduction: This is a supplement to the Mr. Massagy trophy guide, meant for those who intend to get the platinum as fast as possible and would rather have a step-by-step guide instead of having to dash around between trophies constantly.

 

Note: If you're going for maximum efficiency, I recommend using :circle: to mash your way through text quickly. In addition, whenever the only choices left are all in the same position, you can move your disembodied finger over the location and alternate between :cross: and :circle: to make it go by even faster.

 

Phone

  • Press the red X button until Rial shows up (Nope! (B))
  • Press the green heart button to accept Rial (Moooom! Somebody Likes Me! (G))

Rial

  • 1) Sooo... You were stalking me outside the window?
  • 1) Not at all, I do that all the time.
  • 1) What kind of game?
  • 2) Dare!
  • 1) Truth or dare?
  • 2) Do you like massages? (You Beat the Tuto-Rial! (S) at results screen)
  • Press the red heart button for your massage (Tutorial with a happy ending (B))
  • Press :circle: to back out

Phone

  • Press the green back button in the top-left corner
  • Press the red X button once to make Nicole show up.
  • Press the green button to accept Nicole

Nicole: Get Eaten

  • 1) HOLY CRAP! A TALKING WEREWOLF!! AAAaaaAAAaaaAAAHHHH!!!
  • 3) Sorry, this is the first time I see such a cute werewolf.
  • 1) Really? What has been your worst date so far?
  • 1) (Make a duck sound) (Duck killed! (S) and You blew it! (B))
  • Press the yellow retry button

Nicole: Three-Star Date

  • 1) HOLY CRAP! A TALKING WEREWOLF!! AAAaaaAAAaaaAAAHHHH!!!
  • 3) Sorry, this is the first time I see such a cute werewolf.
  • 1) Really? What has been your worst date so far?
  • 2) Oh, I'd never blow it like that. I have no ducks left to give.
  • 2) Interesting. So do you live around here too?
  • 1) WHAT! A cave?! Hey babe, if it's cool with you, it's cool with me. (Awoo! (S))
  • Press the red heart button for your massage (Careful with the claws (B))
  • Press :circle: to back out

Phone

  • Press the green back button in the top-left corner
  • Press the red X button once to make Martha show up
  • Press the small blue button in the top-left corner of your phone
  • Under Select Profile, select the top-right square
  • Press the large GO button at the bottom of the screen
  • Press the green button to accept Martha

Martha

  • Any option
  • 1) Nice place you have there.
  • 3) Oh? What do you do for a living?
  • 3) Bullshit!
  • 3) Well, I wanna explore your East Coast.
  • 1) I don't have money... But I have organic gasoline to go all night. (Mother trucker! (S))
  • Press the red heart button for your massage (Gotta love these app features (B))
  • Press :circle: to back out

Phone

  • Press the green back button in the top-left corner
  • Press the red X button three times to make Janein show up.
  • Press the green button to accept Janein

Janein: Two-Star Date

  • 1) Wait WHAT! JACKPOT! Let's do this babe! (It's Something (S))
  • Press the yellow retry button
  • Repeat four more times (Average Joe (B))

Janein: Three-Star Date

  • 2) Uhh... hey... Where are we?
  • 1) It's kind of dark...
  • 2) Oh, no, no! I meant it is, uh... very futuristic?
  • 2) Y'know, this IS a lovely night. I feel cozy in here.
  • 2) I doooon't think my jeans will fit you though.
  • 3) We could but uh... It really does smell weird.
  • 1) I uh... Why do you want to have kids so badly?
  • 1) No, no! Your beauty is... out of this world...
  • 1) But... Babies... Why tho?
  • 1) I can but... Yo... WHAT are you? (Don't put your massage in crazy, man (S))
  • Press the red heart button for your massage (It hurts so gooood... (B))
  • Press :circle: to back out

Phone

  • Press the green back button in the top-left corner
  • Press the blue back button (right above the X button) once to make Mayo show up.
  • Press the small blue button in the top-left corner of your phone
  • Under Select Profile, select the top-left square
  • Press the large GO button at the bottom of the screen
  • Press the green button to accept Mayo

Mayo

  • Tap the Mayo ten times (Poking around (B))
  • Choose any option
  • Choose any option
  • 1) Sure I will, I'm a great listener.
  • 1) What's wrong with your dad? You seem like a... tasteful person.
  • Choose any option
  • 3) Umm... Ahh... Uhh...
  • Choose any option
  • 2) Wow, a mime?! That's awesome!
  • 1) And in my dreams I've kissed your lid, a thousand times...
  • 1) Hello?
  • 1) You're all I've ever wanted! And my pecs are open wide.
  • 1) I love you! (Watch the cholesterol (S))
  • Press the red heart button for your massage (Slippery everywhere (B))
  • Press :circle: to back out

Phone

  • Press the green back button in the top-left corner
  • Press the blue back button (right above the X button) once to make Sarah show up.
  • Press the small blue button in the top-left corner of your phone
  • Under Select Profile, select the bottom-left square
  • Press the large GO button at the bottom of the screen
  • Press the green button to accept Sarah

Sarah: Johnny's Real Job

  • 2) To lose my virginity.
  • 3) How about I get you a mojito? It's on me.
  • 1) Unprotected sex, drugs and rock 'n roll.
  • Choose any option
  • Choose any option
  • 2) Yeah, my name's Johnny.
  • 1) HA! What are you, a cop?
  • 2) I am the employee of the month, every month!
  • 1) That happens when you sell hot dogs at the beach, babe. (Proud of your job! (S))
  • Press the yellow retry button

Sarah: Failure

  • 3) You are beautiful and pretty and I really want to date you!
  • Press the yellow retry button
  • Repeat 17 more times (You win some, you lose some! (B) after your third fail, Yo, where's your mojo? (B) after your eighth fail, and You'll be alone forever... (G) after your 18th fail)

Sarah: Three-Star Date

  • 2) To lose my virginity.
  • 3) How about I get you a mojito? It's on me.
  • 1) Unprotected sex, drugs and rock 'n roll.
  • Choose any option
  • Choose any option
  • 2) Yeah, my name's Johnny.
  • 1) HA! What are you, a cop?
  • 2) I am the employee of the month, every month!
  • 2) I am just the best... in more ways than one.
  • Choose any option
  • 1) Well... Don't mean to brag, but I'm a world champion dancer. (Sugar daddy time! (S))
  • Press the red heart button for your massage (That's.. a lot of toys (B))
  • Press :circle: to back out

Phone

  • Press the green back button in the top-left corner
  • Press the red X button three times to make Dorothy show up.
  • Press the green button to accept Dorothy

Dorothy

  • 2) Uh...
  • 1) So, you come like... from a farm?
  • 2) Well, what do you do best?
  • 2) Judging by your cute face, your talent might be driving men crazy!
  • 1) You know what? I want to take you out on a picnic! You are lovely!
  • 2) Right! Sorry for changing the topic: what do you have in mind for a job?
  • 2) Well... You certainly have the body to model! (Moooossagy! (S))
  • Press the red heart button for your massage (What a dairy experience (B))
  • Press :circle: to back out

Edited by themindisacity
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Phone

  • Press the green back button in the top-left corner
  • Press the red X button once to make Anne show up.
  • Press the green button to accept Anne

Anne

  • 3) Hi! I see you're... glowing.
  • 3) Never judge anyone based on their looks I always say!
  • 1) *Slowly reach for the cross around your neck*
  • Choose any option
  • 3) So... Why DID people stop coming here?
  • 3) Do you like being a ghost?
  • 1) Let's start with what you remember last.
  • 1) *Finger snap* You died while surfing!
  • 1) Aha! So many barnacles! It's been here for years!
  • 1) You have no visible scars...
  • 1) Eureka! You crashed in the spiky rocks and drowned!
  • 1) Word. (I hope that's ectoplasm (S))
  • Press the red heart button for your massage (Who you gonna massage? (B))
  • Press :circle: to back out

Phone

  • Press the green back button in the top-left corner
  • Press the red X button once to make Papu-Aiye show up.
  • Press the small blue button in the top-left corner of your phone
  • Under Select Profile, select the bottom-right square
  • Press the large GO button at the bottom of the screen
  • Press the green button to accept Papu-Aiye

Papu-Aiye

  • 1) Sometimes I feel you are the only one that understands me, Papu-Aiye.
  • 1) Yeah, that's why I made you this Linger profile, just for you Papu!
  • 1) Ha ha! I know! I am your only date so far!
  • 1) Sure! I want that too, Papu-Aiye! Let's start this as a REAL date!!
  • 1) Ahem! Ahem!...
  • 1) Hi Papu-Aiye, my name is Johnny! Nice to meet you!
  • 1) Oh, so you ARE a sailor!? How awesome is that!!
  • 1) Hahahah!! Totally!
  • 2) Oh Papu-Chan, you're so funny!
  • Choose any option
  • 1) Sure, I'll get a beer for you!
  • Choose any option
  • 1) Why do we do this to each other?!
  • 1) You know how I feel about you right? I love you!
  • 1) Thanks, Papu-Aiye. I needed to hear that.
  • 1) I love you too girl!! After all, I only ever wanted to have a family with you!
  • 1) Oh... I didn't know you wanted to pursue your career first...
  • 1) Of course! I DO want you to have a diploma!
  • 1) You... you wouldn't leave me for another guy would you?
  • 1) Oh of course not! I fully trust you!
  • 1) It's just that... you know, about children...
  • 1) It... it's okay. I didn't want to have kids anyway...
  • 1) Yeah, who needs brats running around, amirite?
  • 1) Right! We'll just practice baby-making then! (Real people are overrated (S), Expert Datemeister (B), and Smooth Criminal (G))
  • Press the red heart button for your massage (How does this even work? (B))
  • Press :circle: to back out

Phone

  • Press the green back button in the top-left corner
  • Press the red X button once to make S.O.N.I.A. show up.
  • Press the green button to accept S.O.N.I.A.

S.O.N.I.A.

  • Choose any option
  • 1) I'm so confused right now
  • 1) My logic is undeniable? Is that a compliment?
  • 1) Dating is an ART! I am Mr. Massagy!
  • 2) Hold up! Why delete my Massagys?!
  • 2) Dang, little lady! I wanna byte your .lib.
  • 1) I'm a software with plenty of malware, just for you gurl.
  • 1) Oh sweet baby, you overclock my processor twice a day.
  • 1) You look like an exception I would want to try and catch.
  • 3) Cream 3.141592...
  • 3) You what?!
  • 3) I have a girlfriend and a life outside this game.
  • 2) ... ... Kinky! (Hackerbruh! (G))
  • Press the red heart button for your massage and sift through some text (Bytes all over you! (G) and I am the glorious Mr. Massagy! (P))

Edited by themindisacity
Editorial sweep
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