Jump to content

The Secret of Monkey Island: Special Edition

Insult Sword Fighting List...


Recommended Posts

Insult Sword Fighting

This list is made up of the insults that you need to learn as well as their responses in order to beat the Sword Master. You will have to use the responses from your earlier fights with the pirates as replies to the Sword Master’s new insults. Each reply fits with both a pirate insult and a Sword Master insult. The Sword Master’s insults are referred to as “S.M. Insult” from here out.

_____________________________________________

 

Pirate Insult: This is the END for you, you gutter-crawling cur!

-or-

S.M. Insult: I've got a long, sharp lesson for you to learn today.

Response: And I've got a little TIP for you, get the POINT?

_____________________________________________

 

Pirate Insult: Soon you'll be wearing my sword like a shish kebab!

-or-

S.M. Insult: My tongue is sharper then any sword

Response: First you better stop waiving it like a feather-duster.

_____________________________________________

 

Pirate Insult: My handkerchief will wipe up your blood!

-or-

S.M. Insult: My name is feared in every dirty corner of this island!

Response: So you got that job as janitor, after all.

_____________________________________________

 

Pirate Insult: People fall at my feet when they see me coming.

-or-

S.M. Insult: My wisest enemies run away at the first sight of me! & I usually see people like you passed-out on tavern floors.

Response: Even BEFORE they smell your breath?

_____________________________________________

 

Pirate Insult: I once owned a dog that was smarter then you.

-or-

S.M. Insult: Only once have I met such a coward!

Response: He must have taught you everything you know.

_____________________________________________

 

Pirate Insult: You make me want to puke.

-or-

S.M. Insult: If your brother's like you, better to marry a pig.

Response: You make me think somebody already did.

_____________________________________________

 

Pirate Insult: Nobody's ever drawn blood from me and nobody ever will.

-or-

S.M. Insult: No one will ever catch ME fighting as badly as you do.

Response: You run THAT fast?

_____________________________________________

 

Pirate Insult: You fight like a dairy farmer.

-or-

S.M. Insult: I will milk every drop of blood from your body!

Response: How appropriate. You fight like a cow.

_____________________________________________

 

Pirate Insult: I got this scar on my face during a mighty struggle!

-or-

S.M. Insult: My last fight ended with my hands covered with blood.

Response: I hope now you've learned to stop picking your nose.

_____________________________________________

 

Pirate Insult: Have you stopped wearing diapers yet?

-or-

S.M. Insult: I hope you have a boat ready for a quick escape.

Response: Why, did you want to borrow one?

_____________________________________________

 

Pirate Insult: I've heard you were a contemptible sneak.

-or-

S.M. Insult: My sword is famous all over the Caribbean!

Response: Too bad no one's ever heard of YOU at all.

_____________________________________________

 

Pirate Insult: You're no match for my brains, you poor fool.

-or-

S.M. Insult: I've got the courage and skill of a master swordsman!

Response: I'd be in real trouble if you ever used them.

_____________________________________________

 

Pirate Insult: You have the manners of a beggar.

-or-

S.M. Insult: Every word you say to me is stupid.

Response: I wanted to make sure you'd feel comfortable with me.

_____________________________________________

 

Pirate Insult: I'm not going to take your insolence sitting down!

-or-

S.M. Insult: You are a pain in the backside, sir!

Response: Your hemorrhoids are flaring up again, eh?

_____________________________________________

 

Pirate Insult: There are no words for how disgusting you are.

-or-

S.M. Insult: There are no clever moves that can help you now.

Response: Yes there are. You just never learned them.

_____________________________________________

 

Pirate Insult: I've spoken with apes more polite then you.

-or-

S.M. Insult: Now I know what filth and stupidity really are.

Response: I'm glad to hear you attended your family reunion.

Edited by Lostsaint18
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 month later...
  • 4 weeks later...

Thanks for the list. It's helpful. I love some of the insults, I just sat there laughing out loud at them.

 

For those having issues with getting the pirates to say new insults instead of "I'm rubber, you're glue" or "I'm scared" etc., I found a few things that helped me out.

 

• Always start out with the newest insult you've learned, if the pirate knows it you'll get the response.

• Once I got a new insult (which I obviously did not have the response to yet), I would select "I give up, you win" and quit the match so I could go on to the next one.

• The pirates seem to have different skill levels with the insults. The further down the list you go, the more "advanced" the pirate (this isn't definite, but it seemed that way when I was playing). If I needed a specific insult, I tried to use one of the ones near it to see if the pirate knew it or not and see if he might say the one I needed. Of course, it's a bit of hit and miss since they can be random.

 

These things seemed to help me and it didn't take me too long. One other thing to do is stand at the intersection and let the pirates come to you. Many times you'll get one right after another.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 years later...

Brilliant list, thanks. Could be easier for people if they write a list of them all and check them off as they go. As soon as someone says one to you, make sure you say it to the next pirate and hope they have a reply to it. Rinse and repeat.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 years later...

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now


×
×
  • Create New...