P_Pigly_Hogswine Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 (edited) It is with great sadness that I bear the news of the passing of our PS3 Fat. It died yesterday doing what it loved: playing games and being randomly sworn at while tackling Dead Nation on Morbid. It survived the Graveyard battle, but the wounds it sustained in protection of its friends were ultimately fatal. It was a sudden, but expected departure, and we're relieved it came somewhat peacefully and PS3 Fat is now playing the Great Game in the Sky with all the other much loved consoles including Sega Master System, NES, N64, PSX, and three Xbox 360s. On a happy note, we're pleased to say SNES and Dreamcast are still doing well. PS3 Fat entered our lives back in 2007. It was with the passing of Xbox 360 3 we decided to try a different console. It was a happy day as PS3 Fat was a heavy and healthy newborn. In those days, there were no DS3s, but instead a comically light Sixaxis. We all had a laugh, but liked it all the same. PS3 Fat came with a copy of Spider-Man 3 on Blu Ray. We loved the picture quality but were entirely less impressed with the dance scene. Upon purchasing Planet Earth (the doco, not the actual planet), we relished in high definition polar bears, like the inverted Cheshire Cats they are. Games back then were bleak. We ended up with a copy of Ninja Gaiden Sigma, which proceeded to kick the arses of anyone who went near it, and a little known game called Uncharted, which proved far more likeable. Since those days, and over five years, PS3 Fat became a much loved member of the household. It streamed episodes of Peep Show. It played that one and only Eagles of Death Metal album we could be bothered ripping. And it was there through over 40 platinums. In fact, it earned its 43rd and final on Saturday, struggling to breathe as we aced that Avalon level in LBP2. It was there when Demon's Souls attempted to destroy us all, and was there on the day the PSN went away. It was a lonely few months, but in the end, the PSN came back, gifting it the game that would be its last: Dead Nation. But like Dead Nation, PS3 Fat was turning into something akin to a mindless, shambling corpse. It struggled with heat, and found itself having dizzy spells. Originally only God of War 3 and Kratos' high def pectorals would cause it to go weak at the knees, but in the end, even the onslaught of Plants Vs Zombies would bring upon a state of catatonia. Perhaps PS3 Fat was making a stand against zombie games. Perhaps it sacrificed itself in protest? Perhaps if we played Dead Rising 2 the death would have come sooner? Whether PS3 Fat succumbed to old age or the Umbrella Virus doesn't matter. What matters is the five years of faithful service PS3 Fat brought into the household. We will miss the way we'd accidentally turn you on while cleaning your touch panel. We'll miss the fact you could stand up straight all by yourself, and we'll miss your rotating logo. We'll even miss your dorky Spider-Man font. PS3 Slim has some big shoes to fill. Love, the Hogswine Household. Edited February 6, 2012 by P_Pigly_Hogswine Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
honda hoe Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 nice obituary lol i myself lost my phatty in 2010 RIP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake_357 Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 I think when I get my slim in a few days, I'm just going to go outside and put a whole clip of a 9mm in my almost dead phat. And video tape it of course. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DKsDragon Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 Both fats still going strong. It really is like losing a member of the family whenever they go in for maintenance... apparently I don't put much stock in my family... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
morg106 Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 Thank you for this. I was weeping gently by the end of it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Psikorps Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 My condolences for your loss. (seriously) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thali Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 Brilliant read R.I.P fatty. Here's to hoping this 'zombie virus' isn't heriditary, because your fat 2009 English offspring would quite like to finish Dead Nation at some point. Not to mention Resident Evil 6 later in the year! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
P_Pigly_Hogswine Posted February 6, 2012 Author Share Posted February 6, 2012 And with the passing of the fedora/lightsaber/six shooter, PS3 Slim will finish what its father started. Dead Nation will be a Really Dead Nation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peixe02 Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 I just gave my fat PS3 a long hug after reading this. RIP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjc0961 Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 See, now this is what you expect people to get upset and make a thread about. Not a controller. I think when I get my slim in a few days, I'm just going to go outside and put a whole clip of a 9mm in my almost dead phat. And video tape it of course.You'll shoot your eye out, kid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JHChiBulls Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 That was beautiful Vale PS3 Fat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stork77 Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 Nicely done. Game on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Galaga43 Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 I'm sorry for your loss. I thought I too had lost my old fat friend recently, but after a few tense days and 3 hours of open heart surgery our tired yet stalwart companion made it through at the 11th hour. He is now resting comfortably in retirement next to his new slim brother who will now take on the brunt of the gaming duties. Even though he is tattered and torn, he is still a much loved faithful friend. I just hope that one one day I can find a way to repay my sleek, squat, and trusty old work horse. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
P_Pigly_Hogswine Posted February 6, 2012 Author Share Posted February 6, 2012 I'm sorry for your loss. I thought I too had lost my old fat friend recently, but after a few tense days and 3 hours of open heart surgery our tired yet stalwart companion made it through at the 11th hour. He is now resting comfortably in retirement next to his new slim brother who will now take on the brunt of the gaming duties. Even though he is tattered and torn, he is still a much loved faithful friend. I just hope that one one day I can find a way to repay my sleek, squat, and trusty old work horse. If I could be bothered (read: not at work) I'd totally Photoshop PS3 Fat into the poster for War Horse. Or better yet: PSFree Willy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goatamus Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 My condolences Hogswine. It really sucks when someone you love passes on. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChinoNYC Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 The Chino™ sends out his condolences to Boss Hogg. May the P-Fat rest comfortably and burn out while trying to revive the Linux system (pre-2.15) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gibbga Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 Condolences from our PS3 Fat family to yours. I feel as though we should be sending trophies in lieu of flowers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ricardo407 Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 that sucks man, my 60 gig fatty died sometime last year, I know how you feel, but I still have my 80 gig fatty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ChinoNYC Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 http://i1089.photobucket.com/albums/i358/ChinoNYC/NewGFX/PlatinumOrig_001.png Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pyramat Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 That was beautiful. My 2007 PS3 Fat is still going strong, he's been awesome to me. I'd pretty pretty disappointed if he died. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Doug-E-Fresh1994 Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 very nice read. sad to see it go. it lived a good life my phat lost a heat exaustion battle 3 years ago. it went suddenly and sadly. i dont think that it tasted the online world (or trophies) yet. brought from the dead for a month and died suddenly again, our second one lasted longer and has moved to my room and is still going strong. it has survived dust, abuse and 50 days of cod playtime. it has lost many controllers and has put a hole in my wall but i love it. the slim im my house has not been touched by me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjfan97 Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 Nice obituary there. I feel saddened for your loss, hopefully the Slim will have a longer and happier life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harry94_ Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 Thats real nice. I should have done something like this when my fat PS3 died. RIP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AshtimusPrime Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 Angels are playing Dead Nation on your PS3 now. My two fats will give a warm welcome at the gates. RIP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flclfanman Posted February 6, 2012 Share Posted February 6, 2012 I still have my PS3 Fatty. Alone, but not dead in this brave new World. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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